kids in care

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Joined: Thu May 03, 2018 9:45 pm

kids in care

Postby sweetpie80 » Thu May 10, 2018 11:13 am

my kids are in care last 2 years is ever possible get them back i have no hope suffer with deppression anxsity been diagnosed persnality disora and my children were subjected to my mental health issues drinking domestic viloence is there any hope

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2088
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: kids in care

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Thu May 17, 2018 2:32 pm

Dear sweetpie80

Welcome to the parents’ discussion forum.

It must be very difficult for you to be without your children who are now in care. Do you have contact with the children? I hope you are able to see them. If you do not have contact, is there any particular reason given as to why you cannot do so?

Regarding whether you could have your children back, this is not an easy question to answer. This is because you have listed different health and lifestyle issues which you think led to your children being taken from your care. It is sometimes possible for a parent or parents to apply to the court to have the care order discharge, this can only happen if it can be shown that significant changes have been made and the concerns that led to the children being removed are no longer an issue.

In your case, as you have mentioned depression, anxiety and personality disorder, domestic violence and drinking, it would be important that you have received or continue to receive help and support in all of these areas. If your mental health issues are managed even with the use of medication, then that would be a step in the right direction. You would have to show that you have engaged in alcohol services to stop excessive drinking. The court would need to see evidence of the changes made and how these might be maintained over time. In relation to the domestic violence, if you are still in the relationship and have not sought help for yourself then you need to think about this as well and also consider if it would be a good environment for the children.

The court’s main concern is always the children’s welfare so, even if changes have been made, it would need to be satisfied that returning the children would be the best thing for them.

I suggest that you read a copy of the judgement, if you do not already have a copy, you can ask your solicitor for it. As your file may already have been put away there is likely to be a fee to retrieve the file to get the judgement for you. You need to read the judgement to see what the judge said were the reasons you could not safely care for your children.

A copy of our advice sheet relating to Reuniting children in the care system with their families will give you more information.

It is difficult to be separated from your children and you may wish to speak to someone about your current situation. MATCH is an organisation which is able to offer you support and here is their website

I hope you will find this information helpful but, should you wish to speak to an adviser, you can telephone our advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday.

Best wishes


Posts: 2
Joined: Thu May 03, 2018 9:45 pm

Re: kids in care

Postby sweetpie80 » Sat Jun 09, 2018 10:38 pm

hi many thanks for your reply the main reason thy didnt give me them back is at that time i was still with the father of my youngest child who i have long history with domestic vilonce i handed them over in the end as couldnt cope but thought id get them back but didnt gambling is issue too long standing i went to support place for it didnt make any diffrents im affaid still gamble today feel cant control it also i struggle maintain long term changes which i think is part persnality disora and that will never be changed im waiting on going on course caled me to you group witch suppose to help u deal with emotions in a way thats not hurting my self or taken overdose or doing something bad to myself as i struggle with my emotons and dont know who mange them was doing really well for few months maybe 6 month not getting into theses moments but drank frday called police as thoughts were raceing again didnt know what to do thy were good tho so i also cant shake of feeling guilt should done more and shame and unable cop with it all thats why i turn drink as dont know how mange everything i have little hope this me to you group will do anything help me change my thoughts process very negtive and feel not much hope for futher and certnally no hope or big changes for the children to be retured too me sorry it all doom glum im a realist and belive in being straight talking had councling been alchol help place for many many years and always go back in the end as its just me any way thanks for listening didnt thing anyone was going to answer at all thanks again

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