Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

User avatar
Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2051
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jan 27, 2016 3:28 pm

Dear Shaftesbury

I am pleased to see that you now have a better understanding of the reasons that Children Services do not consider it appropriate for your partner to visit your home and the view they would take if he did so. You seem to have insight into the concerns around your partner being a sex offender and safeguarding your children.

Regarding your question about the issue of self-harming, you say that you do not have could be considered a history and there was only one incident some 20 years ago. I do not think that under data protection rules it is right to have incorrect personal information and I suggest that you put in writing to the Team Manager your concern that reports indicate that you self-harm when this is not the case. If he or she will not change the record, then I think you should contact the Information Commissioner's Office for more details about how to get the data held about you corrected.

You could request a copy of the file the Children Services have about you so that you can refer to the particular reports which have incorrect information. A copy of our advice sheet about accessing records is here for your information.

I hope this helps.

Best wishes,

Suzie

Shaftesbury
Posts: 39
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2015 8:08 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Shaftesbury » Wed Jan 27, 2016 3:30 pm

I have posted a question above, but now I have another question also.

If my partner didn't live so far away, would the normal procedure be for him to be involved in CS meetings and conferences? Or would he usually be complete excluded from having any say at all? I am asking because up until this point he has never been invited, but he is keen to attend. Before I ask my social worker I wondered if this would be a strange thing to do, or is it quite normal generally for an SO partner to attend CS converences and core group meetings?

User avatar
Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2051
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jan 27, 2016 3:55 pm

Dear Shaftesbury

I am a little surprised by this further question and now I wonder if the insight I saw in your previous post is not really there.

Whilst I understand that you have a relationship with a sex offender and wish to continue this, Children Services have made it clear he is to have no contact with your children. It does not therefore seem appropriate that he should attend meetings regarding your children.

Your partner is not the children’s father and has no biological or other relationship with them and I am therefore uncertain as to why you would want him to be involved. Has Children Services agreed to carry out any risk of assessment of your partner? Do you know what he hopes to achieve by being involved in meetings with Children Services about your children?

Since he has no reason to be invited to be meetings it is unlikely that he would be unless he is to meet with a professional for assessment purposes and that would certainly not include involving him in meetings.

It is of course entirely a matter for you if you wish to ask the social worker about his attendance but it could mean that a view might be taken that your do not fully understand the risk posed to your children by your sex offender partner.

I hope you find this helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

Shaftesbury
Posts: 39
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2015 8:08 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Shaftesbury » Wed Jan 27, 2016 8:50 pm

Thank you for your reply.

There were a couple of things which made me wonder whether he is supposed to be at the meetings. In the "early days" of CS involvement they said he would probably be invited to future meetings but he was not required at the initial conference. This led me to think he was perhaps expected to attend at some point.

Then at meetings and conferences when questions have been raised regarding anything surrounding my partner, it has been said "as he isn't here to answer that question we will have to assume ..." which then also made me wonder if he was supposed to be there. Its unfair if CS and other professionals are continually assuming things without actually asking him what they want to know about him, isn't it?

When I said my partner is keen to attend, I was meaning he was willing to attend should he ever be required, not that he was keen to attend and talk about my children. I realise this could have sounded misleading.

But anyway, if I have simply misunderstood then I accept that. I just didn't want to be excluding my partner from something he would generally be expected to attend.

Shaftesbury
Posts: 39
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2015 8:08 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Shaftesbury » Fri Jan 29, 2016 10:03 am

Deleted

L89
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2018 10:46 am

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby L89 » Mon Jun 18, 2018 7:10 pm

Hello, here my situation

I've been dating this guys for a few weeks now. And since the third day he told me that He was on the sex offender register and has been to prison for a year . The cause was because it dowland without knowing it a file that was containing child stuff and the fact that the person to whom he dowland the file was been monitoring ,that's how they track him . He told me as soon that he saw this stuff he delete it but apparently he needed to go on the hard drive to delete it . And it was considering like sharing this stuff with other people.
So now he can't approaches kids under 16years without being supervised. He will stay on the sex offender for 10 years and his offence was considering as minor.
Now he took an appointment with his officer so we could meet her. What you need to know it's I'm a mum of two kids 2and 5years old . I'm on the process of divorcing and my ex can't approaches me and the kids due to verbal and domestic violence. My ex can just have contact on the phone three times a week. Since we met he hasn't see the kids and we always meet up at his house or outside my home. When he spoke to his officer she say that she needed to speak with me and that we should keep that way for the moment .
So what I want to know, will it be able for him to be around my kids?
Does my ex will have to know about my boyfriend situation ?
And if my ex knows would it be like something put in place so he can't disclose my boyfriend situation to anyone?
Can we get married , have kids?

Thank you

Kami2018
Posts: 72
Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2018 5:08 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Kami2018 » Tue Jun 19, 2018 5:31 pm

I can not for life of me understand why any normal human being would want to have a relationship with a sex offender to start with makes me so sick to think about this but to actually think that' u would want this sex offenders around your children I can't bethy head around this these people are dangerous criminals and a risk to all children at all time no matter what courses they have done or how long from a offence was committed as it shouldn't make a difference the very thought that they had these urges towards children should be enough for any parent to absolutely not want z relationship with them and never with there children

User avatar
Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 2051
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Jun 20, 2018 2:01 pm

Dear L89
Welcome to the parents forum.

You are currently involved with a new partner who was convicted of downloading and sharing indecent images of children. He has told you early on in your relationship about the convictions and how he is under conditions not to be with children under 16 unless he is supervised.
You are due to have a meeting with his officer who will explain to you about the convictions and what his risk is to your children.
You could ask for more information about the images he downloaded. What were the ages of the children, male or female, what were the images of and how have they been classified.
Ask the officer about any course or therapy he could do to lower his risk to children.
The officer is likely to discuss whether a referral might be made to children services.

You ask about whether he could ever be with your children unsupervised and about you having a child together.
Your partner is not allowed unsupervised contact with children under 16 for the next 10 years. So if these conditions remain in place I cnnot see how practically he could live in the same house as you and your children.
It would be impossible for you to supervise the children when you are asleep, for example. But there may be times of the day that you and your partner could be together in your home if that was assessed as safe.
Ask his officer for her views and what he could do (courses and support) to lower his risk to children. Have a look at the Parents Protect website that advises about how to protect children.
If a referral is made to children services, then during the assessment, dad may be told (but not always) of any risks. The social worker would need to weigh up any risks to you ad the children from their father -because of the past domestic violence and what protection or support might be needed.
You should have a better idea of your options once you have met with the officer.

if you have any questions please post back or call our advice line on 0808 801 0366.

Best wishes,
Suzie

Shaftesbury
Posts: 39
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2015 8:08 pm

Re: Sex Offender Partner & Residency of Children

Postby Shaftesbury » Sun Jul 01, 2018 10:55 pm

Is there a way to delete or edit the details in the opening post on this thread please? I am concerned over privacy and as this thread comes up easily in a Google search I'd really like it removed if possible please?


Return to “Are social workers worried about your child?”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests