Family Rights Group | Parents’ Forum

Well to be honest I don't really know where to start. 28weeks ago I had a one night stand with a man who previously had his children removed. I am now 28weeks pregnant with his baby. I have had NO contact with this man since the one night stand. I phoned ss myself at 18weeks pregnant and told them I was concerned about what him and his history would mean for my baby. They decided not to do anything until 24weeks when a social worker came out and said a core assessment needs to be done. So I am currently in the process of that, up to date she has said they have no plans for a pre birth assessment and may close the case with support from homestart and a caf. I also signed an agreement saying I will allow this man to have no contact with my baby when born or my 4 year old daughter. The thing that worries me is that guidelines state that a pre birth assess$ent and cpc HAVE to be done if either parent has had children removed and that the cpc should be held at least 10weeks before birth. So why are they not doing this in my case? I have also sent the sw a message today asking her this although she won't get back in touch until after the new year. Are they not doing a pre birth assessment because he is not involved or what? She has visited my home twice and said she has no concerns about my living conditions, no concerns about my daughter and has been in touch with nursery and health visitor who have also said they have no concerns and are very supportive of me. I also explained the situation to my midwife on thursday as the sw was suppose to get in touch with her but hasn't up to now. She is also supportive, and said they can't possibly consider removing my children when he is not a part of their lifes, he doesn't even know I'm pregnant. She said she has no concerns and I have attended all of my apps which are quite often, I see a consultant and have a scan every 4weeks due to my daughter being very premature. Anyway the social worker text me on friday to say the midwife left her a voicemail. I have shown the sw all the baby stuff and asked if there is anything else I need to buy she has said no and that the baby stuff I do have is lovely. She asked me how I afforded it all I told her I have been putting money away since very early in my pregnancy. She is also saying she is worried about how anxious and worried I am about everything, but obviously I am going to be worried these are my children not just something I can replace. Was just wondering if anyone had any advice on my situation and what the likely outcome will be???? I am very very worried and have not been able to enjoy this pregnancy at all also the stress has made day to day life difficult for me and my daughter as I'm so scared of losing her. The social worker said as long as I'm not having contact with this man and they have no concerns about my parenting then my little boy will be coming home with me is this right????

Hi mummyof2,
This is just a quick reply to put your mind at rest. I have a child in foster care and am heavily pregnant, I have been told no pre-birth assessment required, its only necessary if they perceive a risk for unborn baby.

Your midwife would have had contact from
Children's services by now if any action was on the cards. Hope this puts your mind at rest for remainder of your pregnancy.

Children's services involvement is not subtle if they felt the need to be involved with your life you would know by now.

Thank you so much for replying, life is very hard right now with everything that is going on. I've been trying to find out about these pre-birth assessments but the only info I have managed to find there is always a bad outcome. My daughter really is my pride and joy and so will this baby be regardless of who its father is. I just don't feel like I'm able to make plans for my little boy or be exited about being pregnant if there just going to take him away. I am terrified of going into hospital as while he is still inside me he is with me if you know what I mean. I just don't understand how they could take my son away at birth when I'm doing great with my daughter, although they haven't actually said anything of this kind at all I guess I've kind of convinced myself this is what will happen, you never hear any good stories about them. It just seems so surreal that my babies could be taken away because I had a one night stand with a complete nightmare. I thought they automatically had to do a pre birth assessment and cpc if a parent has had a child removed?? I've read your story on your other post and I really hope everything goes ok for you I can't imagine how hard it must be to be away from one of your children, I'm having an awful time as it is and as it stands my babies are still with me. Maybe we can keep in touch as I don't know anybody else in my situation and only my close family know and all I hear from them is that everything will be ok which doesn't help. How many weeks pregnant are you now? Do you know the sex? thank you so much for replying x

Hi mummyof2

Welcome to the board. My name is Suzie, one of the Family Right’s Group’s online advisers.

Sorry to hear that you are finding the current Children’s Services involvement so distressing at this time.

Hopefully I can attempt to put your mind at ease, in addition to the useful advice already offered by Murray.

You are now 28 weeks pregnant, but understandably anxious because the father of your unborn baby, (with whom you have had no contact since you became pregnant) has previously had a child removed by the Local Authority.

It seems that once this information about the father’s past became known to you, you have severed all ties, made a self referral to Children’s Services, and have since acted appropriately to keep both your 3 year old child and your unborn baby safe.

To date, you have fully engaged with the core assessment being completed by the social worker, and given them consent to speak to the midwife, health visitor and nursery (for your older child). For example, no multi agency concerns have been expressed by any agency involved with you. It seems that your own anxiety and the fact that your first born was premature, are the only issues to consider.

Make sure you obtain a copy of the core assessment report, as this serves as a written record of the strengths of your parenting capacity, any concerns or support needs you may have at this time. Raise any anxieties with the midwife or health visitor who can offer advice, and liaise with any agencies on your behalf.

Furthermore, Children’s Services have now told you (if only verbally), that rather than making plans to convene a child protection conference, they feel that community based family support would be more appropriate via Homestart, who can offer practical parenting support. With a Common Assessment Framework (CAF), a multi agency support package can be put in place.

You can ask any of the professionals to explain the process and a family group conference (fgc) to you in more detail. An Fgc or a family led meeting chaired by an independent person, can be held, so you can be fully involved in making safe long term plans for you and the children.

Please be aware that under a CAF, your cooperation, whilst recommended (is voluntary), and any agency can act as the lead professional, ie health visitor may be most relevant, as they will continue to have long term involvement with you long after the birth of the baby.

From what you say mummyof2, (from the information you provide), this is the best outcome from Children’s Services that you could hope for. So please try to relax, continue to keep your appointments, engage with any support that is being offered and keep professionals updated of any change in your circumstances.

Best Wishes


Suzie

Hi Mummyof2

Hopefully Murray will be along shortly with some advice for you. In the meantime, I just want to make sure you have seen my post in the other thread as well, as it answers some of your questions here.

Best wishes

Suzie

Which other post are you referring to? Thanks

Whoops, sorry Mummy, I meant to post that last message in the thread called "your advice please" and you had asked Murray a few questions. The post I was referring to was the long one in this thread. Sorry for any confusion.

PS I have also posted on the correct thread!

Hi Mummy,

Just to clarify the reason for no pre-birth assessment is because the risk posed to the Child removed from my care was the Father, he is a convicted sex offender and subject to a Sexual Prevention order. I am now in a new relationship with a non offender and domestic violence was significant factor in my previous relationship, I have worked with Woman's Aid and done various courses etc over a long period of time (CS first became involved with my family back in Dec 2007 when he was arrested for downloading indecent images of Children). I suppose CS can say with some confidence that the historical relationship is not now a factor in my life, as this has been tested over a measured period of time.

Of course I am still seperated from my Child and although I have been told "there is no risk to the safety of that child by myself " I am still not able to commit CS to a plan for re-unifaction at this point.

I cannot see from your post's that you have anything to be concerned about at this point of your pregnancy. You have fully cooperated with CS and have recognised the risk this man would pose to your unborn Child. I can't see what more you can do at this point.

From reading the numerous posts on this site over a period of time the three main reasons Children are removed are as follows:
Failure to cooperate with CS.
Dishonesty when dealing with CS.
Failure to recognise a risk posed to the Child.

Obviously every situation is different and you have to remember people only provide limited information regarding the situation but these are simply my observations.

Thank you for your replies. The sw came out yesterday and basically said that I look after my daughter 'beautifully' that I interact with her really well and that I'm very organised as a parent and she has also said nursery and her health visitor have said the same. She told me I mustnt compare my situation to the babys father and his ex because my situation is completely different. She said that she has more or less finished her assessment but that she was going to wait for more information on the babys dads past so she can discuss this with me but because I'm so worried she can finish the assessment before they receive the information but that she's very busy in court for the next few weeks so she will write her report and get her manager to sign it then come out once more before the end of jan to close the case, I asked if her manager would agree to close it and she said yes because it goes on her recommendations and she is a senior social worker. She said they wouldn't remove my children because of him when he is not involved. She is recommending a caf and might be at the 1st meeting to handover the case but said if I give my permission they can just send the information. I asked her if they would be holding a cpc and she said no that if they were going to hold one then they would have definitely done it by now because I already have my daughter in my care. She said there are plenty of families she needs to be seeing who"s situation is much worst than mine and who sadly do need their help. I showed her my hospital bag and she laughed at how much stuff I'd packed. She seems ok and seems to accept that there's not much else I can do but keep him away from my family which I'm already doing. So hopefully by the end of january I can get on with my life and my case will be closed. But I will keep people updated. I always thought they would just want to take my kids away but this doesn't seem to be the case. Guess I've just got to stay positive and keep myself busy until the end of january to stop myself going crazy with worry!! She also asked if I would take my little boy to see her a few months after he's born so this must be a positive thing and I'm pretty sure she said they have no plans at all to remove either of them from my care.

Hi everyone, just wanting to give you an update on my situation.

The core assessment has been completed and apart from the babys fathers history the report was very positive.

I received a letter a week ago from CS's which states

Dear ----
I am writing to confirm that following the completion of a core assessment in respect of ---- and your unborn child childrens social work services will not be taking any further action as there is no evidence to suggest that you are having contact with ----- due to the potential risk he poses.

As discussed the childrens social work service have recommended a CAF to be undertaken by ------- childrens centre to ensure you are provided with appropriate support following the birth.

Thank you for your cooperation during the assessment process.

Should you require any further support in the future please contact me or make a referall on -----

Yours sincerely -------

COPY TO
Health visitor
Midwife
nursery/childrens centre


She said when she gave me the final report they have closed my case.


So does this mean they will not be involved at all now?
And that they can't re-open my case for the exact same reason only if they have new concerns?

Thanks