Family Rights Group | Parents’ Forum

DesperateDad, you.paint a very mean - and accurate picture of the social services in Britain. Absolutely prejudiced and cruel on the topic of sex offences. It covers such a broad spectrum of behaviour, seldom posing a risk to the offenders own children, yet these zealots - just because they 'can't be sure' - destroy families without conscience. The do not care about children; they care about their own backs. They are not the same thing. If they cared about the children, they'd worry about the possibility of perfectly safe relationships with parents being profoundly curtailed by their 'safeguarding' measures. But the effects of this are not provable (even though its the majority of cases), whereas abuse should it happen (the extreme minority) is of course demonstrable and would come back on them. This is why it is themselves (their careers) they care about, not children.

an update in my post. still no sing of cs. my husband has his sentence on the 12 of September. he got 3 year of community order with 140h unpaid work and 60days rehabilitation and 10 year shpo. he is been on the register since beginning of august anyway. But no sing of cd. at the.moment he see the kids under my supervision but i know this is not going to last. i dont understand why cs still no contact me. how long? if him still see the kids under my supervision will the cs see it as me no protecting them? i got a boy and a girl 8 and 12. i dont have any contact or name for them.

Dear mva17

Thanks for posting again.

I am sorry that because of children’s services failure to get in touch with you and your husband, you are finding it very frustrating as you are not sure about their expectations now your husband has been convicted and sentenced.

It may be due to an oversight or lack of available staff why no one has been in touch with your from children’s services. Perhaps more urgent cases have dropped yours down a social worker’s list. Unfortunately, am unable to give you any clear cut explanation.

You say you do not have details of who to contact at children’s services. Should you wish to make contact, I suggest you go to your local authority’s website and look at children safeguarding, you could telephone the number, explain to the duty social worker that you were expecting to hear from a social worker. They will need the names and dates of birth of your child/dren to find out who the allocated social worker is on your case. Alternatively, you can simply wait for children’s services to make contact with you.

Regarding the current arrangements for your husband’s contact with the children, I do not think should be a problem if you continue to supervise contact. It would be an issue if children’s services were to find out that you allowed unsupervised contact.

Children’s services may want to do a risk assessment but it may be that the restrictions on your husband state that he should not have contact with children under 16 unsupervised anyway.

You may wish to speak about your situation to an adviser on our free confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3pm Monday to Friday.

Hope this is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

another update. My husband has been to the probation office twice and he is starting to move forward in the righgt direction. Still no news on the children services. No one has contacted me since he put his name on the register, i understand that can be because he doaent live at home, but he still see the children and i found very frustating than no one has come to me to explain what can he do or not. i try to contact children services several times, first they said the didnt know anything about my kids. and but they will look onto it and call me back. they never did. i call after that several times and they say the same thing always in a metting and they will call me. but this never happens. i just worried that one day they are going to turn up and say my husband cant see them. they are not going to understand that. i olso which time frame they will be using?

Hi hun that sounds very frustrating as u say you wouldn't like then to just turn up in the future what u should maybe do is phone and ask to speak to there duty social workers regarding your children and circumstances because I don't think because ur partner doesn't live at home why they've haven't been out because they should always come out in these circumstances and assess the situation because they will have to assume safeguarding needs to be in place .

after calling them for 3 days i got a call back. they say because my husband is supervised by probation officer and they did an assessment on my and my kids before, they are happy for me to supervise him and they are not taking any further action if nothing changes. So I am quite happy, still going to be very hard, but now we can concentrate on him getting help and we can see a light at the end of the tunnel.

still seen no one from.children services only a quick chat on the phone. Now they have send my a paper to sing. i just got one question "Any contact facilitated by xxx should be facilitated outside of the family home in the community". this means is a suggestion or always need to be outside? is anywhere where i can get advise before signing the letter?

Hello

You can go to your local CAB office and they in turn will signpost you to where free legal advice is available to suit your specific concern/query. In my area the office is only open on two specific days and it is on a first come first served basis. You can also send them an email. Alternatively you could go to a solicitor that offers 30 to 60 mins free advice?

Until you have received advice - I would not sign. What CS are asking is not a legal contact.

I hope this helps?

mva17 wrote:another update. My husband has been to the probation office twice and he is starting to move forward in the righgt direction. Still no news on the children services. No one has contacted me since he put his name on the register, i understand that can be because he doaent live at home, but he still see the children and i found very frustating than no one has come to me to explain what can he do or not. i try to contact children services several times, first they said the didnt know anything about my kids. and but they will look onto it and call me back. they never did. i call after that several times and they say the same thing always in a metting and they will call me. but this never happens. i just worried that one day they are going to turn up and say my husband cant see them. they are not going to understand that. i olso which time frame they will be using?

mva17 wrote:after calling them for 3 days i got a call back. they say because my husband is supervised by probation officer and they did an assessment on my and my kids before, they are happy for me to supervise him and they are not taking any further action if nothing changes. So I am quite happy, still going to be very hard, but now we can concentrate on him getting help and we can see a light at the end of the tunnel.

mva17 wrote:still seen no one from.children services only a quick chat on the phone. Now they have send my a paper to sing. i just got one question "Any contact facilitated by xxx should be facilitated outside of the family home in the community". this means is a suggestion or always need to be outside? is anywhere where i can get advise before signing the letter?

Dear mva17

Thank you for your further post.

I can see that you have been very concerned at the lack of communication from children’s services regarding the current situation relating to contact arrangements for your children with their father.

It is good that you were finally able to speak to someone after several attempts

Children’s services have confirmed that having carried out their own assessment of you with the children they are happy for you to supervise contact. There is no further action that they wish to take at present but this may change if circumstances change. I am a little surprised that a social worker did not meet with you to explain exactly what the expectations are going forward and you were simply sent a letter. This may be because they have no concerns about your ability to keep the children safe as a protective parent. I suppose they now want you to sign to confirm your agreement to what was discussed on the telephone.

You are concerned about signing something that you do not fully understand and, as such, I would advise you to make contact with the allocated social worker and ask him or her to meet with you to go through anything you do not understand. In this way, you can be sure that it will not be said in the future that you breached the agreement that you have been asked to sign.

It is, I think, best for you to be very clear and happy about what you are signing, so do get in touch with the social worker if you have not already done so. This will clarify things for you, explain you are not refusing to sign just want to be clear about what is expected of you.

I hope this is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie

yes i am.surprised to. they relay on the assessment of probation. As you say my only concern is not to fully understand what they expect from me. Also this week i got i call from the school of my little one and they think.she need support because she is not understanding the situation. so they want to explain that to them too. i am surprise how they done an assessment without seen the children either. they must be very busy.