What would be involved....bf on SOF

Mysocalledlife
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:02 am

What would be involved....bf on SOF

Postby Mysocalledlife » Wed Sep 13, 2017 9:34 pm

Hi I've been with my boyfriend for 7 years.
It was 18 months ago when the police came to the house to confiscate all electronics....he was charged last year for IIOC category C 21 images in total, has completed his community service & now only sees his PO once a month. He is now on the SOF for 7 years and 6 remaining. He stated to me that yes he did go on adult sites but never intentionally to look at inappropriate images of that kind and doesn't know how & why they would have been on the computer and I believe him. he is naive and scared at the time and we wasn't fully told the procedure at court and stupidly pleaded guilty. My concerns are now if we were to have a baby which we have spoke about for years as a normal couple does but now he has this stigma attached to his name and I do fully support him I'm just stuck, confused, upset don't know where to get advice from, what would the best or worse outcome be? Please help, thanks

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 1687
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: What would be involved....bf on SOF

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Fri Sep 15, 2017 1:11 pm

Dear Mysocalledlife,

Welcome to the Parents Forum.

I can see that you worried that your partner’s conviction for downloading indecent images may impact on your family, if you were to have children of your own.

If children services were aware of your partner's conviction, then they would want to assess him to find out whether he may pose a risk to your child as well as assessing your ability to protect your child against any risk.
You may also want to be fully reassured that your partner is safe to be involved with the care of your children.

Children services may become involved, if a referral was made to them. This would be very likely, during the time your partner is on the sex offenders register.
Here is information about children services assessments .

If they assessed your partner as potentially risky, then they would expect both you and him to undertake courses and support to reduce those risks. While they are unsure about your partner's risk or he has a negative assessment, then they may ask that you and him agree to restrictions being placed on him seeing his child. This might be him moving out of the family home or having supervised contact with your child. So children services intervention may impact significantly on your family life.

I suggest that both you and your partner consider accessing courses and support now, before you have children, to minimize the disruption of children services involvement.
The starting point for your partner must be to find out what courses or therapeutic support can he access now, via probation.

You could also contact the Lucy Faithfull Foundation/Just Stop It Now helpline. They offer advice and support about risks of child sexual abuse.

I hope this advice helps. If you have any questions, please post again.

Best wishes,

Suzie


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