Partner registered sex offender

crazynutter
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2017 5:33 pm

Partner registered sex offender

Post by crazynutter » Tue Mar 07, 2017 10:48 am

Hello everyone,

I was accepted on here a few week ago but have been thinkin about exactly what i wanted to ask.
So basically his sopo states he is not allowed to be near or live undee the same roof of any child under the age of 18. We had our first family protection meeting around 2weeks ago which was agreed on child protection plan until assessments on me and partner are done (it is not yet known how high of a risk he is).
We are both wanting to resume the relationship with hopes of being allowed to live together again. So at the protection meeting i was told they do not like a child protection plan to last more than 6month so after having time to think over everything i asked the social worker what happens after the 6month which she replied either goes back down to child in need or close case. So im now left wandering what happens in both of those cases of going back to child in need or it being closed? If its closed does that mean he could then live with me and the kids?
From what i can figure the thing of under 18s will never go away but an exception is added so he can be around my kids living in the same house?

Redjellybeans
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Apr 24, 2014 3:03 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Redjellybeans » Wed Mar 08, 2017 6:54 am

Children's services will want to see you as protecting your child, resuming your relationship may not prove this to them. I was on a cp plan for 9months, 6 may be the ideal but if you don't think about yout children first , they have the option to extend this. Which is what happened in my case. I stood by partner after allegations had been made and was told I wasn't protecting the children. 3 years on, I can see I wasn't now,couldn't then though!

I divorced my ex partner, even though he wasn't charged with child sex offences, and am so glad I did what's best for my children. I understand you have feelings with him but he has an SRO for a reason and you need to acknowledge this. I've kept my children and he only has contact centre contact with his children.

If you want to pm please feel free to.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Thu Mar 09, 2017 9:34 am

Dear crazynutter,

Welcome to the parents forum.
Redjellybeans welcome back and thank you for your supportive post.

Child protection plans are made when it’s suspected that a child has suffered significant harm or is at risk of harm and the risk is still ongoing. So in your case your partner is seen as a sexual risk to your children.

It is good to hear that you are cooperating. If you did not cooperate, and put your children at possible risk from your partner, then children services would be concerned about your ability to protect. If you have any questions about the child protection plan, speak to the social worker. Here are FAQ’s about child protection .


As Redjellybeans says, the child protection plan can be renewed and can overall last longer than 6 months. It not unusual when waiting for a specialist risk assessment for child protection plans to last well over a year. So push for those assessments. Find out who is doing them, when will they start and how long will the assessment last. Ask to see any report.


The child protection plan might go down to a child in need plan or no plan if your children are no longer at risk of suffering sexual abuse. This decision can only be taken at a review child protection conference .
This might be because dad is assessed as low risk to his own children. But it also might be, like in jellybeans case, that dad is still a risk, but you as mum understands his risk and can protect them.

To find out more about the risk of sexual abuse in family situations and support that is available to your partner, you and your children, you could contact the just stop it now helpline at Lucy Faithfull Foundation.

If you need further advice, please post again.

Best wishes,

Suzie

Chancing
Posts: 20
Joined: Mon Sep 19, 2016 2:39 am

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Chancing » Fri Mar 10, 2017 4:20 pm

Just a couple of questions,
Is this man your baby father?
Long term partner? Or a new partner.
Child protection was extended to 12 months in my case.
My partner is on the SOR, and I have contact with his social worker, his PO, The PPU and his group workers. All with his consent.
I would strongly advise you request more interaction with his services.
I am concerned you don't seem to know about his licence conditions, if he has them.
Is his offence historical or recent?
Have you full details of his offence, from a source other than him.
I love my partner dearly but I didn't take a word he said about his conviction at face value, and in fact I was informed by the social work team and the public protection unit of his offences.

If he was to live with you your address would have to be registered.
I would consider very carefully if you want a SO registered at your address. For your children's safety, people outside your circumstances may not be very forgiving if they found out.
Do you know if your children's school will be informed?
You realise your kids could never have friends to stay?
Birthday parties etc.

There is a lot to consider, more than just if it's ok for him to be there.

If he has meetings and assessments I would request to attend, if he has been honesty there should be no problem with this.

Having experienced much of this myself I am surprised by the lack of intervention from the services, especially since it's your children who are at risk.
Take care, and all the best.

Granny7
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Oct 17, 2017 5:21 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Granny7 » Mon Oct 30, 2017 7:46 pm

hello,

can someone give me a bit of hope...daughter has been told by probation and the governor that she is not allowed to go and live back at her own home when she is released on licence and that she can only see her step son supervised. Probation want to come to talk to us her parents with regard to her living with us...this is what i want as she is disabled and needs 24 hour care. What will probation want to know..how do i go on about other grandchildren that visit our home, will the PO talk to us about this...I dont know what the supervision of her stepson is yet, however i do feel that she is being made a bit of a scape goat as we complained loudly about her treatment by healthcare. This is something that we have never had to deal with, any recommendations will be welcome
Thankyou

crazynutter
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2017 5:33 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by crazynutter » Mon Oct 30, 2017 8:14 pm

Figured i would update this, it's been quite some time since my post and i decided to separate from my partner and think it was the best thing I ever did and also decided to deney him contact with his son for the time being. A 2year old is not going to have a clue what was happening etc and I'm not goin to put him through that.
Now I just await january for the next protection conference so the kids can be taken off the protection plan and get my life back on track.

crazynutter
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2017 5:33 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by crazynutter » Mon Oct 30, 2017 8:16 pm

Granny7 wrote:hello,

can someone give me a bit of hope...daughter has been told by probation and the governor that she is not allowed to go and live back at her own home when she is released on licence and that she can only see her step son supervised. Probation want to come to talk to us her parents with regard to her living with us...this is what i want as she is disabled and needs 24 hour care. What will probation want to know..how do i go on about other grandchildren that visit our home, will the PO talk to us about this...I dont know what the supervision of her stepson is yet, however i do feel that she is being made a bit of a scape goat as we complained loudly about her treatment by healthcare. This is something that we have never had to deal with, any recommendations will be welcome
Thankyou
I would recommend you start a new thread as I doubt people will see this. I have no advice sorry.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 4210
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Nov 01, 2017 12:02 pm

Dear cazynutter,

Thank you for updating us. I can see things have changed for you. If you need further advice at all, then please post back or call our advice line om 0808 801 0366.

Best wishes,

Suzie

Redjellybeans
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Apr 24, 2014 3:03 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Redjellybeans » Sat Nov 11, 2017 3:21 pm

Crazynutter,

Glad to read that you feel you have made the right choices. Unfortunately I allowed my ex to have access supervisered with the children e in the early days and we are now still in a bitter court battle as he wants my youngest unsupervised. He still has an outstanding investigation going on but still he is trying to gain custody of our daughter.

If only the family court system would see what he is 7 allegations later and we are still no nearer the end of this. I'm sure that children's services are happy with your decision and wish you well for the future.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 4210
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm

Re: Partner registered sex offender

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Nov 15, 2017 1:07 pm

Dear Redjellybeans

Thank you for your post.

I am sorry that you are still in court proceeding about contact.

It is not clear from your post at what stage you are in the court proceedings but I assume that the judge will want to have a section 7 report prepared by your local authority children’s services or by a Cafcass officer. The report will be prepared after discussions with you and the father and children. A recommendation will be made whether unsupervised contact would be appropriate.

Any concerns you have about unsupervised contact you can tell the person preparing the report. It will be for the judge to make the final decision after taking into account all the evidence.

You are involved in private law proceedings and as such, I suggest that you contact Coram Children’s Legal Centre (Child Law) advice line on 0300 330 5480. They will usually give advice provided you do not already have a solicitor representing you.

I hope this helps

Best wishes

Suzie

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