Potential social services involvement

[HazPP]

I was wondering if anyone could give me some advice?

Last year SS were involved with my 3yo daughter because my husband had been accused of accessing indecent images of children. He was arrested and our devices were taken away and assessed. In the meantime he couldn't have alone time with our daughter until they concluded if he should be charged or not.

After 6 months it was found that there were no images in any devices and that a client of his had used his Skype login details to exchange images, hence why they thought it was my husband. The case against our daughter was closed. They commended us on our compliance, honesty and strength through the whole process

I am pregnant again and when I was 6 weeks gone (a few months ago) me and my husband had a row in our bathroom in which I pushed him and he pushed me back. I then had pregnancy bleeding (not due to the pushing). I freaked out because I thought I was miscarrying. I left with my daughter and went to the doctors, where I broke down and told her about my day. She put on my records that we'd had an altercation. We worked things out though and agreed to give the relationship another go.

My midwife spoke to my GP who logged the incident as domestic violence. The MW said that because SS had been involved before (although in hindsight we know this was not necessary) she would be making a referral. I am now terrified that my children are at risk of being taken away. I am 19 weeks pregnant and barely sleeping because of this. Haven't told my husband until SS have made a decision on wether to be involved. I don't think it's necessary, we're not unsafe and it was very much an isolated incident that we're trying to move on from.

Can anyone tell me what is likely to happen now? I was referred to an Independent Donestic Violence Advisor by the midwife, who saw no concerns and is making no referrals, and I don't need to see her again. I'm so worried I feel sick.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear H**,

Welcome to the Parents Forum. Congratulations on your pregnancy.

I am sorry to hear about Children services involvement in the past and that a new referral has been made by your midwife.

I can see that you are very worried about this referral.

You are also worried that your children will be removed from you. From the information you have given and knowing about your cooperation in the past, I do not think you need to worry.
Children can only be removed from parents if the parent consents or if the court grant an order giving children services legal parental responsibility to remove children. Then they would have to prove that the child had suffered and/or at risk of suffering significant harm or is in danger.

Instead, I think children services, (if they decide to carry out an assessment)will be assessing and considering whether or not any support can be offered to your family.
The fact that they were involved in the past (wrongly as it turned out) means they will already have a lot of detailed information about your family, how it works, and how cooperative you have been in the past. The fact that you cooperated will be viewed very positively.

Because children’s services will be worried about possible domestic abuse (it was recorded as such by the GP) and because babies and young children are particularly at risk from potential domestic violence due to their vulnerability, I think it is more likely than not, that the social worker will want to carry out an assessment.

You can give the details of the independent domestic violence advocate who has already assessed the situation and advised you of support available.

As you did in the past, cooperate with any assessment and consider seeking any support that is offered.

Here is some information about domestic violence and children services that you might find helpful.

I hope this information helps. If you have any questions at all, please post back.

You could also contact our advice line for further advice and support on 0808 801 0366.

Best wishes,

Suzie