In need of some advice.

[BettyBoop1967]

On 13th February this year (2023) my partner was called into her Grandchildren's school (Primary School). She walked into a room with several Police Officers and Social Workers (a shock to say the least).
The story goes, that the Grandchildren's Parents had been neglecting the Grandchildren and it was reported to the school by someone else. The Grandchildren were interviewed (individually) at school by staff, then the staff thought it appropriate to call the Police in and the Grandchildren put under Police Protection. The school had reported similar things last November to Social Services, but nothing happened. This time the school went directly to the Police.
The Grandchildren's Father was arrested at home and their Mother was arrested at the school, when the school asked her to attend. They were taken down to the Police Station and bailed until the middle of May on charges of Neglect and also Assault of the Grandchildren. The terms of that bail, state that can have no contact with the Grandchildren and cannot be within 100 metres of my home (where they are currently living) or be within 100 metres of the school/nursery when children are present.
My partner was asked, could she take the Grandchildren (9,8,7 and 2) or they will go into care immediately. She said she would take them. Since then we have been having problems with Social Services.
The reason for the Neglect was that their Father would rather spend money on his Cannabis habit than fill the Kitchen cupboards, leaving the Grandchildren underfed, a rather untidy house (dangerous in my opinion) and he has been told about this consistently, My Partner (his Mother) and I have been in several times to clean the place top to bottom, and it just went back to the same mess with the parent's laziness. Also, it appears the Fathers partner was hitting, etc the Grandchildren discreetly, when on her own as only 1 child is biologically hers (the youngest) and the other 3 his, by a previous partner who went elsewhere years ago.
Now, we have the Grandchildren in our care until at least the middle of May (when the charges are either dropped or their bail extended and maybe a Court hearing).
Social Services are being no help what so ever to us. We are taking the Grandkids to school and back everyday on buses, as their school is 3 miles away from our home, our food bill has gone up massively. It was OK when we had the Grandkids every other weekend,money wise that was planned for, but now it is 24/7, so all our costs have gone up and we live on Disability Benefits. Social Services are saying this is now a private arrangement and a Police Protection issue, because the Police used their powers of protection, so Social Services have basically walked away from it. They say get money off the parents, which is easier said than done. Social Services had a legal meeting last week (Thursday morning), but didn't tell us anything. My partner phoned the Social Worker late Friday afternoon after we had picked up the Grandchildren from School/Nursery to see what was happening, to be told, they had the meeting the day before (but no decency to phone us at the time, left it until we phoned them, as the Social Worker said, he was going to phone us just before he left the office on Friday Afternoon (Evasive in my view). No doubt so we couldn't phone him and get a response, as it would be then the weekend. The upshot of the meeting is that Social Services will not help us out, we should get the money off the parent's and that the Grandchildren are now under Child Protection (which Social Services put them under in the first place).

Social Services are blaming the Police for taking the Grandchildren into Police Protection (which legally only lasts 72 hours), so they won't do anything and say now it is a private arrangement between us and the parents, as if they gave us any real choice. (Take the Grandchildren home with you or they go in care) and the Police not really doing anything, we are still waiting for the Grandchildren to be video interviewed 5 weeks later from when they came into our care, with reference to the Assaults.


Everyone knows the Grandkids are with us for their own safety and what an improvement in their dress, tidiness, homework, reading, etc (something we are really hot on, which was very lax when the Grandchildren were at home to say the least) and they also gaining weight, now colour in their cheeks, while they have been with us this last 5 weeks or so and school/nursery are great impressed by the Grandchildren's improvement and they are happy, smiling, etc where as before they were sullen, head down, quiet, etc. No one in officialdom cares to help us out, bouncing 1 dept off another and 1 law (rule) off another. The ONLY people that have given us some real help are the school and Nursery with food vouchers (Tesco/Morrisons) and also Foodbank letters and also being leinient with us,the bus times make the Grandchildren about 5-10 mins late for school, as there is only 1 bus per hour, then a 3/4 mile walk, so the school are fine with us being a little late and still marking them in on time.
We are doing everything we can,but I feel like the authorities are urinating on us and just leaving us hanging out to dry and we, feeling like Mushrooms (Kept in the dark and fed on S..t) by the authorities.

I am awfully sorry this turned into an essay, but it was the only way to put all the relevant facts in, in some sort of order.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear BettyBoop1967

Thank you for your post and welcome to the board.

I am glad that you outlined the full story of how your grandchildren came to live with you and why, thanks.

Firstly, please have a look at this definition of what Police Protection is and what children’s services ‘should’ do when the police ‘take action’ in this way.

Next, here is a definition of what a private arrangement might be, pay attention to paragraph 3.

After reading the above, please download and edit (to suit your family situation) Letter number 4 on this page of our website.

Do bear in mind that at this point the children’s parents are not allowed to have contact with them therefore it would be impossible for them to exercise their parental responsibility: if you, as grandparents, were not available to care for the children they would have been taken into foster care. This is a strong argument for you to take to children’s services in your area.

If you want to delve into the statutory guidance for local authorities in relation to kinship care, here is the document.

If you would like to speak with one of our advisers, do call our confidential service on 0808 801 0366, lines are open Monday to Friday (excluding Bank Holidays) from 9.30am to 3.00pm

I hope this information is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie