Christmas contact!!!

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Posts: 45
Joined: Wed Aug 01, 2012 1:11 am

Christmas contact!!!

Post by sasha » Wed Dec 19, 2012 9:30 pm

I am not looking forward to Christmas this year as my GS (4 months) is due to be adopted early in the new year.
However, the contact arrangements upto a few weeks ago was 5 days per wk, 3hrs per day for his mother (our daughter) 3 days per wk for her partner (not dad) and 1 day per wk for us Grandparents for half the session. Then due to the final evidence being prepared to be submitted to court in the new year, contact was reduced to 3 days wk for 2hrs for his mum, 1 days wk for 2hrs for partner and we get 1 day wk for 1hr! The 3 days were recorded as having to be Tues/wed/thurs which seemed to be pre planned as the contact centre is closed on those days next week :(

We attended a LAC review meeting last week whereby the court guardian for my GS stipulated that a young baby cannot hold a memory of its mother for 4 days between contact from one wk to the next and said it needs to be spread out more evenly.

Naturally, I requested that my daughter should have contact next week on Monday at least and this was sanctioned, but unfortunately, at the cost of mine and my daughters contact tomorrow.

I then realised that even by going with that plan, it will be 9 days between Christmas Eve and 2nd Jan which is when the next contact would be. I have spoken to the SW's manager today regarding this matter and her reply was "we have to accomodate 700 children over xmas"!!!
I reminded her of the guardians comments of GS's lack of ability to retain his mothers memory over 4 days and she feels that the guardian is wrong and must have meant 4 weeks!!!
I ask you, what planet is she on?

I didn't expect this Christmas to be an easy one but the SW's must be away with the fairies to think this is acceptable to do to families.

Does anyone have any comments/thoughts on this please?

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Robin D
Posts: 1848
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 12:58 pm

Re: Christmas contact!!!

Post by Robin D » Wed Dec 19, 2012 10:00 pm

All I can suggest at this late hour is to see if you can contact the guardian. They are in a position to instruct solicitors on behalf of your grandchild if they feel strongly enough that the LA action is going to damage the child. However, it would need to be their decision. You cannot tell them to do it.

Sorry that things are so traumatic for you and hoping you can find a way forward.

Best wishes ... Robin
Former F&F carer, foster carer, adopter and respite carer for umpteen children. Now retired and when with kids, making sure they 'go home' at the end of the day.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 525
Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 11:25 am

Re: Christmas contact!!!

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Thu Dec 20, 2012 11:59 am

Hi Sasha

Sorry to hear that you are having such a distressing time, regarding contact with your grandchild, at what is already an emotionally difficult time for you and your family.

May I suggest you write to the social worker, copying the social work team manager, independent reviewing officer and children's guardian, (requesting a written response before the end of the week), to advise how they intend to ensure the contact continues to be in your grandson's best interest, and there are no obvious gaps to the contact schedule, during the hectic xmas period.

Does your daughter's solicitor have a view about the current lack of clarity around contact?

Best Wishes


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