Fed up with social workers and their lies

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MandyLou
Posts: 50
Joined: Sat Nov 17, 2012 10:23 am

Fed up with social workers and their lies

Postby MandyLou » Wed May 14, 2014 4:02 pm

Life is a bit of a turmoil at the moment. We have our grandson on an RO and have been being assesed to foster our grandaughter (who is in local authority care). Alongside this an ex-member of my other half's family has made some very serious allegations (pack of lies) about my husband, which is why grandaughter did not come to us at birth (she wanted to care for the baby, so she could get a bigger house etc, and when she was told we were a better option she made the allegations).
Long story short, 5 months later we are still waiting for some resolution - historical cases are not on anyone's priority list.
In the meantime the care proceedings continue for our grandaughter and the social worker completed a viability assessment on us which was negative due to the ongoing investigations. BUT, it also said that we would not be considered anyway and had a couple of reasons which included a failed viability assessment for our other grandson (different birth parents) a few years ago.
At the time of this first assessment we did not see the report. We were told that it had not been pursued because of the very new re-kindled relationship between us and the birth father so they were looking for other family members. This new report for our grandaughter says that the previous viability assessment failed because of extensive social work involvement with the family in the past.

So I now absolutely know for sure we have been lied to. I suspected as such. How on earth can a professional public servant get away with lying to the people they are working with. I guess she just didn't want to tell us the truth, which is a shame as if we had known the original assessment was negative we would have either challenged it then or never decided to try to foster our grandaughter now. And we might have been able to avoid my other half being subject to malicious allegations. Oh how our lives would be different. The distress of living with sword of damacles above our head is making me ill.

The other side of things now is that despite our grandson thriving and their being no concerns about him being in our care, the viability assessment for his sister says that he is an open case as a 'child in need'. I don't think he meets the definition of child in need. We have a RO. He is not disabled. He is thriving. We have never been told he is 'child in need'. There have been no meetings and there is no plan.

Not to mention that the viability assessment report was written at the very last minute and filed with the court before we had even seen it or had a chance to comment. And it is full of errors and typos. If I had written a report at my work like that my boss would have sent it back with instructions to do it again!

We would have been able to meet the social worker the week before but she cancelled BY EMAIL (she has only ever phoned before) without giving us a reason - cowardly.

I am sick of it. I love my grandson with every ounce of me and I will do all I can to make sure he is safe and remains with me. We have decided not to pursue a private order for my grandaughter as it would probably fail at the moment - I just hope there is a couple out there who want to adopt a baby girl, and I hope we might be able to get family contact with her in the future.

It is a mess. I am tired. I just needed to scream at someone and you guys always support us screamers!!

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ied53
Posts: 2100
Joined: Fri Aug 18, 2006 11:26 pm

Re: Fed up with social workers and their lies

Postby ied53 » Wed May 14, 2014 6:54 pm

All I can offer is a hug but it is a big one
Irene
Grandparent carer in Lincolnshire
Tough times never last tough people do

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David Roth
Posts: 2022
Joined: Thu Aug 10, 2006 10:14 am

Re: Fed up with social workers and their lies

Postby David Roth » Wed May 21, 2014 10:02 am

I am very sorry to hear about the difficulties you are facing in trying to take on the care of your second grandchild, and keep your two grandchildren together. It must be very disappointing to feel not only that the social workers have not been straight with you, but also that someone else in your family network would make serious allegations against your husband for their own purposes.

Have you been able to see the report from your earlier assessment? If you still don't know exactly what was written, then perhaps you should ask to see it. You would probably not be able to see information in the report that came from third parties, without their consent. However, you should be able to see the social worker's opinions and what they have reported as facts. You would then be in a better position to comment on the accuracy of the report. Our advice sheet 26 takes you through how to gain access to your records: http://frg.org.uk/need-help-or-advice/advice-sheets

Is the local authority's stance that they still don't know whether to believe the allegations or not, and therefore they do not want to take the risk of placing your granddaughter with you? If this is the case, and you want to oppose it, then you could consider being joined as a party to your granddaughter's proceedings, where you would then have access to all the court documents and papers. You would also then be able to make your own case directly to the judge - judges are not always as risk-averse as social workers. The judge and the Cafcass officer may be more willing to take note of the fact that your grandson is living with you without coming to harm, and that you offer an opportunity for this brother and sister to grow up together.

It does sound very frustrating, and you say how tired you feel, but there could be opportunities for your voice to be heard in this process.
David Roth
FRG Policy Adviser

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MandyLou
Posts: 50
Joined: Sat Nov 17, 2012 10:23 am

Re: Fed up with social workers and their lies

Postby MandyLou » Thu Sep 04, 2014 11:37 am

We are now the other side of this really difficult time in our lives. The allegations against my husband are not being pursued any further (lack of evidence) which is a real weight off our shoulders.
However it did not get resolved soon enough for us to take on our grand-daughter. We told the children's guardian that she needed a resolution and it would not be fair to make her wait for the end of the investigation process (as we did not know how long it would take). The result is she has been freed for adoption.
It is so sad. This cannot be the best solution for her, or for her brother.

I'm happy that we are able to move on from this really horrible situation, but saddened that a little girl is going to grow up outside of her biological family. It may be for the best, in the end, but my heart is just a little bit broken.

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 426
Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 11:25 am

Re: Fed up with social workers and their lies

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Fri Sep 05, 2014 10:49 am

Dear MandyLou

I am sorry that the outcome of the court case was not what you had hoped for.

However, you may find it useful to refer to our care proceedings and adoption advice sheet for your own information.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes

Suzie


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