My Grand daughter has 2 adopted sisters

DNana
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Jan 24, 2017 3:11 pm

My Grand daughter has 2 adopted sisters

Postby DNana » Mon Jan 30, 2017 3:28 pm

Hello all, thank you for accepting my request to join this forum.

I'm hoping to get some advice about our situation.
It's complicated so I'll try to be brief.

My son was in a complicated relationship with a girl in 2010, it was a very hard time and ended suddenly after death threats against my son.
The girl was pregnant at the time, it was not certain as to whether my son or another man was dad.
The girl was in a bad relationship in the years that followed, she had a second child in that time.
The two daughters got taken into care and adopted in 2013
Then suddenly in late 2015 my son and her get back together and create a new life, get married and become parents together (all very sudden but I ask that no one judge them here)
SS again get involved in May 2016 (due in a major part to lies told by the "other man" involved in 2010, a registered sex offender) and we've just now been stepped down to DAF.

SS never approached us at the point of the girls being taken into care, even though the mum told the SW at the time that my son could be the dad of the oldest. Due to a Life Story Book being done we now know that there is nothing in any of the notes to suggest that there was a question mark over parentage. No sign that DNA was ever questioned for the oldest.

The question is how do we go about finding out if the oldest daughter (now 6) is in fact a full sibling to my grand daughter? To me it's important that all three girls know.

User avatar
Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 406
Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 11:25 am

Re: My Grand daughter has 2 adopted sisters

Postby Suzie, FRG Adviser » Wed Feb 01, 2017 1:49 pm

Dear DNana

Welcome to the friends and family carers forum.

I am glad to hear that children’s services involvement with your granddaughter been stepped down to offering support. Things are clearly very different than a few years ago. That is really good news.

But I am very sorry to hear that you were not approached by children services when there were original care proceedings in respect of the 6 year old girl who could have been your sons daughter.
The law says that, if it is not safe for children to live with parents, they should be placed within the extended family and friend’s network. Adoption should be considered as a last resort.

Given mum told the social worker that your son could have been the father, this should have been ascertained by a DNA test. Are you sure that the issue of parentage wasn't sorted out at the time of the 6 year olds birth? What records are you looking at?

Now that the 6 year old is adopted, I do not think there is anything that can be done now, until she is an adult.

But you should consider contacting After Adoption who will be able to advise you about the process of getting in touch with those who have been adopted.
After Adoption also have birth ties helpline who can advise what support might be available now.
I am sorry that I am not able to help you further.

Best wishes,

Suzie


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