any info grateful

[dont have a clue]

hi

Recently my partners brother passed away and his girlfriend is pregnant and due in 6 weeks. The baby is my partners late brothers. The mother has had two previous children adopted. Social services rang my partners mother last Wednesday to ask if she would take the baby and suggested that me and my partner took the baby as she is not in the best of health. Social services rang my partner and asked id she would take the baby we agreed and she made arrangement to come to our home and speak to us further but cancelled on Friday. We have since found out that the mother of the baby sister has had assessments and councilling to take the baby. She has a son of her own who has been in and out of her care and we do not want the baby to go and live with her we want to give the baby a good home. so i have a few questions why have social services left it to get in contact with us with such little time to go? Does her sister have a good case or guardianship? can we arrange with the mother for all rights of the child to be signed over to us?

Many Thanks

[David Roth]

Hi dont have a clue and welcome to the family and friends carers' discussion forum.

There are a couple of ways that the local authority might deal with it if there is more than one person interested in taking on the care of a baby.

One might be to call a Family Group Conference (FGC). This is an organised meeting where the family comes together and discusses what to do, without the social workers being present for that part of the meeting. If the family can agree that one person presents the best option for the child, then it can avert two parties having a court battle where they are competing for the child. I would recommend avoiding a court battle if possible, as they can not only be quite costly, they can also be quite bitter, since in making the case for themselves people inevitably end up putting down the other party by pointing out the weaknesses of their case, and family relationships can be quite difficult afterwards. In your case, even if mum's sister does not get to keep the baby she will still be the child's aunt, and if you can be on friendly terms with her it might help with any contact as the child grows up.

Another possibility is that the local authority might carry out viability studies or assessments on both parties. Viability studies are very quick and basic assessments, to gather information about potential carers, and they can be used to see who would be the best option for the child by making a comparison between the two parties. Whoever the local authority decided to go for would then have to go through the more thorough full assessment.

You will also need to think about whether you would want to apply for an Adoption Order or a Special Guardianship Order (SGO). SGO is the order that is most commonly made with placements with relatives, but it isn't automatically chosen, it has to be decided on the basis of what is best for the child. The advice sheets are here: http://www.frg.org.uk/need-help-or-advice/advice-sheets

While there are other possibilities, these are the two most likely courses of action for the local authority. You may find it useful to read through some of our advice sheets: AS3 describes FGCs, AS15 takes you through what happens in care proceedings, AS19 describes special guardianship and AS23 describes adoption.

Please do come back here or call our advice line (freephone 0808 801 0366, Mon-Fri 9.30am-3pm) if you have any queries.